[note: picture has nothing to do with this entry]

Heard in the E.R. today:

“Stick around, there’s bound to be some hand injuries.”

“No kidding, people just don’t get it — don’t hold onto a lit firecracker.”

“Last year, some guy blew his throat out with a mortar.”

“No way.”

“Yeah.  It didn’t go off, so he bent over it to take a look, and it went off.”

“Jesus.”

“The nurse looking at his throat was actually looking at the inside of his throat.”

“Remember that girl who lost her arm a couple years ago.”

“Yeah man, I was in triage and this guy comes in saying his girlfriend cut off her arm.  So I’m like yeah, yeah, probably a finger or a laceration, and whoa, she comes in without an arm.”

“How did that happen?”

“There were so many stories, they never figured it out.  They were drunk and she jumped out of the car, or a car hit them while her arm was out.  Story kept changing.”

“Or someone pushed her out of the car probably.”

“Did they ever find her arm?”

“No.”