Grand Theft Auto IV has been out for a day now, and I’ve already found a video of all the hookers and strippers (getting shot) in it.

Not safe for work … unless you work where Rick works, I guess.

Personally, I’m waiting for the follow-up to Bikini Karate Babes.

Nothing beats the ingenious sexual submission holds in Rumble Roses XX though. Come on, grappling, fetish suits, and gratuitous crotch shots (an oxymoron in my book) - they should be making yearly installments of this game rather than all those Madden clones. Some of the armbars have good form, and I actually used one of the judo takedowns in the game on the mat once (not any of the holds pictured, you pervs).

I’m still pissed that the carpet cleaners misplaced my copy of Dead Or Alive 4. I was still working on those achievements, man. How many gamerpoints is an upskirt bicycle kick worth again?

I have no idea why I like the pixellated maw muffins so much when I’ve got the best imagineable version at home. I generally chalk it up to nature just making men stupid like that, as if every other set of breasts (even virtual ones) triggers some evolutionary reset button in our midbrain, making us act like we’ve never seen such motorboat-worthy mammesmorizers before. It doesn’t take much to divert half of our intellect resources at any time to the thought of paw pillows. It probably took someone an inordinate amount of time just to think of these breast euphemisms *cough*.

Still, if Amy walked around the house in a bikini all day, I wouldn’t miss the games nearly as much. Even covered up, they’re pretty nice comforters. In a strangely comforting “someone cares enough to let me rest here” kind of way. Peace is a warm welcoming bosom. (But tits on a zombie are worthless. Sorry, I just wanted to say that. Once.)